T'was the night before my 23rd birthday...

T'was the night before my 23rd birthday, and it's 11 o'clock and my eyes are at half mass...23 going on 95.

Anywho, I think I have had a lot of subconscious anxiety about turning one year older because I have not been really excited about it. I am thinking it has something to do with the...don don don "TRANSITION." I think in my subconscious, blond, WTF part of my brain I am thinking, " holy shit, a year older means a year closer to actually being expected to know what I want out of life." At this point in my life, I am having a hard time deciding if I should be out saving the world or if I should just worry about which mascara clumps...both extreme, but you get my point. So, I have been thinking about this a lot lately, and I have come to the decision that I am going to start practicing mindfulness again....I can picture you guys reading this thinking, "why do I associate myself with this crunchy granola freak." Just hear me out...my last semester in college I took a mindfulness class (probably the only class that was somewhat beneficial and I actually learned something from. Hehe, thanks mom and dad), and I swear it works! It is by far one of the hardest things to do because it takes extreme focus, but for someone like me who doesn't have a lot of patience, it really helps.
So anyway, the practice is basically not thinking about anything else but that exact moment. You are supposed to be able to take everything away from that moment. It's kind of cool. I made this decision on Friday afternoon about half way through my massage because I had so much on my mind that I was not enjoying myself. When I decided to turn everything off and just embrace what was going on in that moment (thank goodness I shaved my arm pits this time, or that would have been a rather embarrassing moment...for the second time) it was so liberating because I felt everything. Of course it is extremely hard to do every moment of everyday, but I promised myself to try to focus on it while doing things like eating, exercising, driving, and talking with people.

Anyway, enough crazy talk...I am 23 biotches!!!!